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Well, as it is the habit of writing letters is dying down. Hardly anyone writes an inland letter or drops a post card. The other day, a second class child checked at every residence in our apartment for an inland letter and post card and none of us had it. Her mother then was trying to locate the Post office!!

Now with all the yahoo mail, msn messenger and gtalk, the habit of writing an e-mail is also fading.

When my friend asked me to send a mail everyday as she would not be available on chat, I agreed and knowing that there is a lot to share among us on a daily basis , I thought it should not be difficult. But I just could not go beyond a couple of sentences. Probably, I am expecting an acknowledgement or a query from her end which would help me go forward with my thoughts!!

I realized today that laziness to write a mail keeps me from sharing my views with other friends who are not on chat. Surprising ? All you readers must be wondering if there are people who are still not on chat. Yes, I do have friends who are not on my chat and I do receive mails from them on a regular basis. Today, I shall send a mail to them as well as my friend.


Thank you, friend once again for initiating me into writing………..

Happy Dusshera to you all

More than a month passed by, since I updated my blog. It is not that I have run out of ideas , but if I recollect vaguely, some interesting thoughts (who else but I have the last word in that) did spring into my mind which I wanted to share with you. Unfortunately , all those thoughts came to me in the middle of night, when I was too lazy to get up and scribble it . But yes, I used to go back to sleep thinking that the same shall be posted the very next morning. But the next morning saw me busy studying with my son for his exams and hectic schedule in the work.

Unfortunately, today when I have the time, (As most of you can see that I have surfed through your blog today ), none of those thoughts resurfaced to my mind.

Let me end the post by wishing myself with better luck for those ideas to occur at a more convenient time .

Wish you all a happy Dusshera . May the good win over the evil and the world turns out to be peaceful (or should I say green!) .

Mother

Thank you, Banu of God's little angel for tagging me. It is really a nice time to think of my mother when I am standing on the precipice of motherhood.

All the adjectives “ infinite patience, sacrificing, versatile , loving , caring“ fitted her , but I thought , almost all mothers try to acquire those traits.

I had written a post “ Forgive and forget” , wherein I mentioned it is difficult to wholly forget even if we forgive. Today, I feel that a mother forgives her child in the true sense. Yes, she would have got hurt by the uncaring words , but the next moment would be offering a helping hand, forgetting everything that has been said. The one relation in the world where ego has no place. It is only to a mother we can go to, without any apprehensions of whether she would have forgotten, forgiven .

Yes, on discussion with my mother, we realized that is the one relation we also do not work upon. A child at all ages goes out of the way to impress his father but mother is taken for granted. Today, being a mother, I can say that though it hurts at times, but most of the time, I feel proud of the fact that my child has me for granted and am grateful that I had my mother whom I could take for granted. The feeling that we have one person who has undying trust and faith in us can help us climb mountains and face the hurdles of life. That is where the mother are pillars of strength.

I am not saying that my mother did not have any specific traits which adorn her individuality, that can be mentioned but as all mothers are, she didn’t want them mentioned……For once, I decided to listen to her :)

Thank you, mom for all the support extended to me .

UNACCEPTABLE!!!

Though it is true, I do share some incidents in my post, but I never thought I could create situations so that I could post in my blog.

My son made no remark when he read my post Proud Parent , which is very much unlike him. He might be humble and probably felt that these deeds were not worth mentioning!!! I accepted his silence.


But on sunday, he shocked me. I was not feeling well and on top of it I was also upset with him for not studying as his exams were going on. He retorted back, "You are waiting for my reaction so that you can write in your blog".

Akash, I am not as imaginative as you are and can write story , but yes, I do get inspired by the real life incidents.

But yes, his remark has certainly made me look at that angle for my new posts. So, guys, let me plan a story line and wait for the impromptu reactions , so that i can post a new one on Monday!!! I shall welcome the opening dialogues from you all.

Independent India’s 60th birthday

As is our tradition, 60th birthday or “shashtiubda poorthi” is celebrated grandly. In our custom , men undergo the wedding rituals once again and bless all their children and grand children.

Today as India is celebrating her 60th birthday, I wish India to get married to her earlier consort who was known for her humility, hospitality, secular in her thoughts and her virtues are talked about and revered even today, divorcing the present companion who is self centered, more hostile than hospitable and takes pride in casteism.

On a different note, I wish the future generation to read the following poem of Tagore , not only as a mere poem but as a slogan . . .

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high;
Where knowledge is free;
Where the world has not been broken
Up into fragments by narrow domestic walls;
Where the words of depth come out from the depth of truth;
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way
Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit;
Where the mind is led forward by
Thee into ever-widening thought and action into
That heaven of freedom , my father,
Let my country awake.


Jai Hind

Viral Attack!!!!

it is amazing how one tiny virus, or probably an army of virus conquer our huge body .Each and every body part feels the pain. We fight back with our army of antibiotics and other pills. At times we feel that pills are victorious while at times viruses emerge winners. After along fight for an week, finally virus accepts defeat but not before creating an havoc. The after effects are felt for a week.

I just wish one of the virus to walk across the war path and look at the tired body and turns to goodliness just like King Ashoka after the mighty win of Kalinga War!

Proud Parent

The incidents mentioned below are not to boast about my son, of course which I can proudly do , but just as an act of gratitude to Him for having blessed me with Akash as my son, who is my close confidante and a very dear friend, even at this tender age of 11. I recollected all these incidents while laying down in the bed day before yesterday when I was suffering from a severe leg ache. I thought posting it in my blog would etch it forever and will be a tool for me to recollect later when my memory might fail me or when I am expected to forgive his youthful misadventures!!

1. Akash was seven-eight years. I am epileptic and those years I used to get major attacks. But the only good part of it was I get a halo : kind of warning that I get before my attack. My husband was out of town, and my parents were living 12-15 kms from my house. My son took my hands, made me lie in the bed , gave me the medicine. He called up my mother. And with his tiny hands, he was massaging my feet to induce the warmth in my body.

2. I keep shouting at my son for being glued to the TV Screen and oblivious to his surroundings and my voice. One evening, when I was bringing the casserole to the dining table, I felt a jerk. Before I could give a call, my son was behind me taking the casserole form me and advising me to go to bed.

3. It has been more than two years , I haven’ t got any major attacks, duly because my son reminds me to take my daily tablets. But, two months back, I felt I might have an attack, and my son slept holding on to my hands tightly.

Just 10 days back, I was majorly upset with him and was sleeping in a different room. I told him not to fall on me and even shouted at him. But day before yesterday, I had a severe leg ache. My son kept a pillow under my leg. I was silently praying to God to chop my legs as that seemed to be the only solution to relieve my pain, while my son sleeping nearby interrupted and told God, that his legs also should be chopped off if he chops my legs as he has kept it on me.

Oh dear, though you are my little son, but at times, I feel so small in front of you. I remember your saying that you are blessed to be born in our family, but I am privileged to have you as my son.

Just a Thought

Just wondering if our anger/fury also contributes to global warming. It certailnly heats up the atmosphere at home!!!

Balance Sheet

Almost all companies across the globe have the financial year restricted to 12 months, be it January to December or April to March. Before the year ends, the companies would be busy collecting the payments , and would not want to carry forward it to the next year. And if the payment continues to get carried forward for a couple of years, it would be referred as “bad debt”.

But, in God’s company, the year seems to have no definitions and varies from individual to individua and according to some religions, it transcends between few lives. For how can we explain that what ever we are to day is due to the karma of the last life.

WHY ?

Always a parent is asked what they an their child to be and is he/her upto their expectations but never asked from children what they want their parents to be and are they up to the expectations of the child?

The right marriageable age

Now that I had mentioned in my earlier post that a person is as old as to the no. of succeding generations he sees. Now that comes to marriage age.

Earlier, people used to marry young . Afterwords, it was an age which was neither young/old. As soon as the boy gets a good job, he got into the marital bliss. Now a days the trend is for a late marriage. People want to grow in their career, buy a house, enjoy their youth before taking on the responsibilities of marriage.

Now, who is to advise for the right marriage age. Yes, if one marries young, one gets to see the children settled by the time they retire . But old age, they become alone. But if one marries old, you still have your child by the time you are old and retired. Yes, it depends on how much we are able to save when we were unmarried. Yet no money would be enough, considering the increasing inflation rates and demands. But, yes, we would have the comforts of the child.

P.S. Here the concept was more on loneliness the people feel when they grow old. If we marry young, by the time we are old, they are settled and busy in their own lives. but if married when one is old, they have the comforts of the child's presence.

from the child's prespective, it is better to have their parents young and working when they have to decide and settle in a career as they can have the luxury of choice, while finacial constraints might force them to accept a career if the parents are retired.

Feel at 84

I feel that a person is as old as the number of generation that succeeds him when he is alive.

My father, though at 84, was not considered old as he still had a daughter living with him and a 11 year old grand son hanging around him. But people of his age had his children married who in turn had their daughters/sons in law and they had children of marriageable age. So, they become great great grand parents and the relationship they share with the younger generation is not as strong and the loneliness creeps in, despite the fact they might stay in as single family.

I would love to be contradicted and this is meerly an experience I felt when looking at people of his age.

Dance To Freedom….A Dance Audition with a difference!!!

Daddy Dearest

A boy, who lost his mother at a tender age of three and came to live with his grandparents , who were staunch Vaishnavites, in a remote village of Therazhundur, fled to Calcutta when he was 14 years, inspired by the communist movement. Later on joined an Italian company to earn his living !

But I am surprised that for a boy who had no guardian, coming from a village to a sprawling metropolis could take to constructive activities, learning languages, Tamil, English, Bengali , Sanskrit and even Italian. He was one of the founder members of the Tamil Writers Association in Calcutta and presided over many of their functions. He was truly a master of languages, I stumbled upon a book which is Tamil Lipi in original, the ancient Tamil script!

He recalls that day in the year 57, a depressed young man, further depressed by the news of his brother’s untimely death , had to go to Madras to perform the last rites. He found his brother’s room was full of God’s idols and the aura there in that room, which gave him the courage to fight life and take on the responsibility of his brother’s children.

He adopted himself to the circumstances , visited temples of all religion, climbed up to Vaishnao Devi, Badrinath and Golden Temple. He knew the customs, religiously practiced the traditions, but never forced us to practice. He believed in his religion , yet he accepted those who did not.

I should take cue from my father’s life and stop worrying myself with the friends that my son makes, and about his activities in my absence. If the then capital city of India, couldn’t spoil a village lad , the present capital city of India can not negatively influence my son !!

Akash : Am I right ??

A month gone by…….

Last month on 8th April at 9:00 pm, when I received the news, my world came to a standstill. My son thought I fainted and rushed to me with Glucon-D. I felt it would be impossible to continue living with out him for never in my wildest imagination I thought of my life without him. But alas, we are forced to continue living, do our duty as he did his till he was alive.

Sundays meant going out and enjoying Kulfi at Roshan di Kulfi or Chole Bhature at Nathus in Connaught Place. We never had to ask him for anything. We got whatever we needed. Whether it is carom board, cycle, it was there for us.

After his retirement, he used to insist on serving us food which we used to dread for he would fill out plates with huge quantity of food. And for a man, who never had to enter kitchen even to fetch a glass of water, he used to prepare tea and bring it to me upstairs when I was studying. He , at the age of 60 for my recovery of health did angapradshanam at Tirupati along with me.

He had a huge collection of Bengali,Tamil, English classics and was a voracious reader till his last days. The day he found it difficult to read even the newspaper, he lost his interest to live. He felt his brain is dying as it was not being nourished.

I had an opportunity to host him for a couple of months. He enjoyed teaching Sanskrit to my son and talk about the freedom struggle and teach him those few chapters in history. It was interesting to hear some one narrate about Khudiram Bose , Netaji in first person. He enjoyed the pakodas, fried vegetables which I cooked for him and ofcourse he had his chole bhature too.

He was very excited that he his going to have his hip surgery and would be able to walk on his own and even challenged my son for a game of cricket. Despite his handicap after the accident, he never felt handicapped. He used to move the objects in the house, took to washing clothes. He was disappointed that in my house, I had a maid doing all those chores and he was to sit idle. Much to people’s wonder, he enjoyed the malls, traveling places, eating ice cream at Mc Donalds, even in his 80s.

I am proud that the death embraced him without any pain . May he attain his moksha.

Faith versus Belief

More often people advise us to have faith in God. What is this faith? I do believe in His existence. I do not follow the rituals traditionally, but yes I do love Them in my own way. I know HE is the guiding force. But isn't faith accepting the decisions without questioning. Is it really possible for us to surrender to His decision? By questioning His decision, do I become an atheist? I do believe Him , but not enough complete faith in accepting the decisions He makes are the right ones.

Differently abled People

That’s how I would like to refer to people who are handicapped. For, how else can one explain the feat performed by Moksha. My best wishes to Vijay Colaco and Rama and may their dream to form a theatre group come true!!!

I would appreciate if this link is forwarded to as many of your friends , so that an awareness be created.

My Father

My father got married when he was 43 years and I was born on his 44th birthday. My father had about 16 years of service with him to guarantee us a secured future. This must have been the main concern for him and so he was busy during our childhood days. Still, we managed to dine together and travel to almost all parts of the country from Kashmir to Kanyakumari. He retired when I was 17 years. But unfortunately at that time, we were busy with our friends, making a career for us and so we didn’t have time for each other.

He never talked about his childhood and youth. We have heard about his kind acts and not so kind acts from our relatives. We experience his knowledge and wisdom in our everyday life. When I stumbled on a few write ups of his, I realized that he is an enigma. I really wish God grants me and my father a couple of years together so that I can chronicle his life and to pass on the wisdom to our future generation.

Ten things that I love starting with 'T"

T : twentieth letter, the letter that is a word in itself, and I am tagged to write ten things I like that start with it. the first thing that came to my mind is

Time : I love it, as this is one thing that is mine. What ever I do with it, solely I am responsible for it.

Tea : I am a tea addict. Needless to say more about that drink. Never say no for this delectable drink, even in scorching summers.

Train : I cant forget the numerous train journeys from Delhi to Madras on all summer holidays. The excitement leading to tiredness and by the time, one reaches Egmore, the desire to jump from the train and run to Madras Central. The steam engines which mades us dirty and darker by the time we reach Madras.

Tram : When talking of trains, this was one mode of transport I used to travel when I was in Calcutta.

Tamil : My mother tongue. Knowing that language opened doors to Silappadigaram, lyrics of Kannadasan, Andal’s Thirupavai, fictions of Sujata and Akhilan.

Telephone : Thanks to Graham Bell, It keeps me connected to all.

Talking : Ask my friends and family. I would not write abt it.

Tiffin : My mother coming out with varied recipes everyday at 3:00 p.m. , which was our tiffin time. Miss them.

Trailers : I enjoy seeing them, so that I get to know the jist of the film. This just reminded me of a incident, I just will share it with you all. Me and my sisters used to walk to school. Then, on Sundays, trailer of movie used to come in Vivid Bharati . My sister was a movie craze and would sit glued near to the transistor and listen to all these programmes. Just taking a cue from one of the trailers, she narrated the story of Ram Balram. Well, till we went to the theatre to see the movie, we didn’t know it was all figment of her imaginations.
Tag : If not for this tag, I would not have got a theme to write.I hope I kept upto your expctations. Thank you, Lalitha.

I also wanted to write Tantrums but I enjoyed while I was throwing the tantrums, not when I am at the receiving end, which I am more often now with a eleven year son at home.

My profile :)

Intresting. Saw it in Lalitha's and priya's blog.

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Conversation with Akash, my son

Mostly, every night me and my son huddled under the quilt talk about the day's events and other general trivia. Yesterday's conversation went something like this :

Akash : I was a very good boy yesterday. No bad behaviour. But today, I made some mistakes. Devil acted but v.little of it.
Me: Devil has entered but not conquered your goodness.once you let them enter, they conquer.
Akash : Now if the good fights the devil , good will win. Since they are in majority , they will win. Even English people were like that. They came to trade, we made them enter thru Gateway of India, gave them permission, and they conquered us and ruled us.
Me : Ya, Throw the devil out and shut the door tightly so that it does not enter.
Akash : I will appoint a Security Guard and see o it that devil does not enter.
Me : Good idea. Who is it going to be?
Moment of silence
Akash : God
Me : Great. But you need to pay the Security Guard.
Akash : How do I?
Me : simple , by getting good marks and being good.
Akash : okey. Now I can sleep peacefully. Good night