Monday, September 04, 2006

To forgive and forget

"To err is human , to forgive is divine."

We all accept apologies from our spouse, children, friends and let the bygones be and continue the relation as it existed. But , later on, at a different time and on different occasion, these issues crop up again.

Does it mean that we have not forgiven the person in true sense. I feel to forgive means to forget that instance. Is it really possible or do we have to be 'divine'" to forgive and forget.

14 comments:

Has to be me said...

Good one! Guess it is not so easy to really forgive in the true sense. But I think maybe its possible as we tend to grow in our inner self & spiritually. And ofcourse we need to make a conscious effort for the same.

Anonymous said...

As h2bee said, in the outter look its easy to smile and walk off. But it takes time to heal and to forgive. It is also based on what situation to forgive them. If it is just a small ones its ok and keep going. But when it applies to majoe breakdowns, it really needs time.
Being casual and friendly is different rather being too close as were before.

Krithika said...

We try to forget the instance and try to move on if we really value our relationship with that person. Can we human beings be divine in the true sense ? Have not come across one so far :-)

starry said...

I think as much as we try to forgive we still remember and bring these incidents up to the surface again. it is not a good thing to do but as humans we err.

Anonymous said...

I too feel to forgive means to forget that instance, but we are normal human beings so its very difficult to forget things.

Anonymous said...

Hmm, its quite true, isn't it? Real sad..

So, what is the meaning o forgiveness if we still remember? Or is it okay to remember, eventhough we have forgiven?

Sujit said...

I feel that it depends on the impact of the hurt that person has caused!.. even thou we forgive!.. but the memory is not gone!.. and when that person does some sort of a mistake in the same relative sense!.. then everything just crops up!... Its the brain way of corelating and keepig track of things.. if you wnat to forget! then you should have short term memory loss..:) like gold fish :)

Twisted DNA said...

We do forget but not so quickly. It takes a lot of good experiences to forget one bad experience.

Anonymous said...

I think that most of the times people "forgive and forget", because not doing so will have more costs than it will have benefits. But they do not forgive and forget in the true sense of the phrase. They make an emotional compromise.

I think that one does not necessarily need to forget in order to forgive. The only way to really forgive a person is by not taking the harm that he has supposedly done to you. Rather, in this situation, there is no need to forgive the person because you do not feel that any wrong has been done to you. In any other case, people only "forgive" for the sake of convenience.

Pritika Gupta said...

Its really difficult to forget the things.. i do ve bad habbit of forgiving at tht moment.. but when ever im in anger i can really use tht against the person.. hurting him fully.. im not able to change..

Junius said...

depends,
on situation and the person.

Known Stranger said...

you should be really divine

Chitra said...

Oh well...everything has limits including forgiveness. But the level varies. How long can you forgive a person if he/she commits the same mistakes over and over again?

Diya said...

a really thought provoking post, was forced to think of so many incidences that have happened when i had supposedly forgiven but forgot to forget !